I thought I might write a snappier title for this weeks blog, but I could not think of anything, so here it is, same as last week with a number changed.
I have just been thinking about our recovery from the pandemic, and wondering if we are now on the up slopes and will emerge at sooner rather than later from the gloom. I think we probably are, but maybe we might have another dip before we can get out of it. And then once we have come out of the gloom there will be so much to do to recover in every sense. There are the mental and physical scars, but there is so much in our world that we need to rebuild, or re-think, like business, travel, healthcare, and education to name but a few. The next few years are going to be very challenging, and to be fair quite exciting for many of us.
So this week for me has been as is normal now, a mixed bag. Work has been exciting, anxiety inducing and challenging all in one. There is so much to do, and it doesn’t feel like I am getting anywhere fast, and that always sparks self-doubt, and the spectre of imposter syndrome. For the majority of the week there has been this nagging voice in the back of my head usually in the morning suggesting that I am really not up to this and I am completely out of my depth. Luckily I don’t think this voice has spilled out, and I hope it has spurred me on, but it is just unpleasant and I would rather not experience it. I am sure it is just an emotional response to the expectations I place on myself, and no doubt I need to stop comparing myself to others half as much as I do. Saying that I have had some very positive moments this week too, all of them have been when interacting with others and not when I have been working alone. Myself and a colleague reflected this week that our team now spends a lot of time isolated from each other, just as a result of social distancing. Something I think will need to be addressed, and I think naturally we are attempting to find ways of doing this.
We went to a gig for the first time in 15 months this week. There we 36 of us in The New Adelphi, all sat down at tables, but it was so lovely to grab hold of something familiar and normal. The bands all local were excellent. We were by a long way the oldest in the room, but we didn’t care. It was a wonderful optimistic moment.
But then as it is with most weeks the mood is dampened by the increasing case numbers and hospitalisations and the obvious delay of the relaxation of social distancing rules. This has to be done if we don’t we will almost certainly have another surge in hospitalisations that will have a devastating effect on Hospitals, that are already overstretched and trying to recover from the first 2 waves. I would even suggest the impact this time would be worth, as the number of sick patients with other conditions is higher than normal, so if we add an influx of sick covid patients, we run the very real risk of the infrastructure of the NHS collapsing under the weight. So it looks like we will have to stay as we are for a few more weeks until we can get a lot more people vaccinated.
The end is in sight. As my couch to 10k app says to me…”keep going, nearly there, you are doing great!!!”